Kathryn. Real.

I’ve got my monthly deadline looming so for now I will just say this:

If you happen to let your child play with the remote entry key chain while buckling him into the car-seat, and then toss the keys into the front seat and close all doors only to realize that he has pushed the lock button and your purse, keys, and child are locked in the car which you share with the two other adults you live with, and your husband has the cell phone that day; be sure you do it in a town where a complete stranger will leave the thrift store where you are stuck and return with two coffee options for you (one decaf, one leaded because she wasn’t sure which one I would want) and a juice for your child.  Coffee lady, thank you, may that good karma come back to you 10 fold.

The other night Kent made some joke about how long it took me to make dinner and how he was just making sure I was putting in my forty hours.  Um, yeah, forgetting that I make dinner almost every single night while timing it to be ready right when he gets home, lets just add up those hours shall we?

Ellis wakes up around 7am each day and goes to bed around 9pm.  That’s 14 hours.  Minus an average 1.5 for nap time (during which I shower and eat lunch) takes it down to 12.5.  But if you add back in the average .5 hours I am up every single night like clockwork when he wakes up and needs me to help him get back to sleep, it’s back up to 13.  Oh, and don’t forget I don’t get weekends off either so all told, 13 x 7= 91.

Yeah.  I think I’m getting my 40 in.

Thank you for providing scrumptious and amazing frozen meals, yummy breads, a good vegan selection, and adequately fresh  veggies all at dirt cheap prices.  You make it possible for me to continue being blond*.  However, if you keep forcing these “Savory, thin mini, multi-seed with soy sauce, rice crackers” down my throat, we’re going to have a problem.

Love and kisses,

Kat

*Small towns are amazing.  The blond-ing costs me less than 1/3 of what I used to pay in Dallas.  And this stylist is just as talented as anyone there too.

Last week I missed my appointment with Doc C., and predictably, this week I’m feeling “off” as he put it. I’m sure it doesn’t help that I started my period yesterday and then woke up with a head cold. Or that Ellis is cutting his eye teeth and molars all at once and I haven’t had a full nights sleep in a month.

I’ve got that feeling you get during the last 5 minutes of the season finale of your favorite show. Like, Jesus I have to wait that long to know what happens next. I am the type of person who will promptly get online and try to find the next seasons spoilers. Unfortunately (or fortunately?) there are no spoilers in real life. (at least none I’ve been able to see until any years later when it’s all played out)

Where will I end up? What is the next step in my journey? All of that unknowing is driving me a little crazy today. Part of the fun of life is that you hardly ever end up where you think you will. Hopefully I’ll get over this little bout of annoying MustKnowNow-ness soon.

Here are the big unknowable things weighing on me right now (it’s nothing really new, sorry):

1. Will Kent get hired on at the company he’s contracting with for enough money that I can continue to stay home? And will that job be as stressful as this one with even longer hours? That’s how it’s looking now.

2. Will we get around to more kids?

3. Can I find a way around going back to school and use a skill I already have to bring in some money? If so, WHAT and HOW?

4. Will I totally fuck up my kid(s) despite my best intentions?

And that’s basically it. Fun stuff huh?

I’ve been trying to embed a video for like 4 hours now and every time I do it messes with my entire layout. Even if it’s tiny. So instead of embedding it, you can all go see the cuteness here.

On Thanksgiving night Ellis asked to wear Kent’s headphones and listen to the “sounds”. So Kent clipped his Ipod onto E’s jammies and let him go. Ellis started dancing like crazy and then stopped abruptly and said:

Ellis: Cool dada. I look awesome!

Yesterday I spent 9 hours cooking and about an hour cleaning up after. And? I really enjoyed every minute of it. There was something about preparing a special meal for my special guys that made doing all the dishes worth it. This year marked the first time I’ve ever made the entire meal myself. And? Everything was edible!! In fact it was all really delicious. Even the garlic mashed made with soy milk, and the cornbread stuffing made with “no-chicken” stock was good. My one snafu was accidentally buying a 46 dollar turkey. Yes, I accidentally paid 46 dollars for an 8 pound veggie fed free range turkey. I am actually that spacey lately, and I’m trying not to throw up when I think about it.

Here’s what I made, documented not because I think anyone cares, but because I would like a record of my hard work to save for all time.

The (46 dollar) Turkey:

The Garlic Mashed Potatoes:

The Texas White Rolls: (you have to thaw them for 3 hours then bake them. It’s totally worth it.)

The Mac-N-Cheese:

It was below 30 yesterday morning:

Hands and feet turkey:

Nap:

Not pictured: the Cheerio treats that Ellis helped with (rice krispie treats made with cheerios), the stuffing (because I forgot to take a picture of it), and the pumpkin pie.

It was an incredibly lovely day in every way. Ellis was all hopped up on sugar and climbing all over Kent. It was frosty outside on our lawn. We had a warm fire, full bellies, and an abundance of love.

This morning Ellis woke up around 6:30 and came to sleep in our bed. When he fully awoke at around 9 he looked over at Kent and said brightly”Hi dada!”, then he turned to me and said “Hi mama, how are you?”. Those moments are the so magical. Life with my boy just keeps getting more fun. It’s amazing.

Update: Good God I can’t be trusted at home alone with all these leftovers. I’m going to explode.

Kent, Ellis and I are alone this Thanksgiving.  It’s a very strange feeling for someone who grew up with noise and cheer; cousins, aunts, uncles,  and debauchery on all major holidays.  We decided at the last minute to cook tomorrow so we made a late trip to the grocery store.  And there among all that craziness, among all those frantic people, I thought about how bad I am at being alone.  If I didn’t have my husband and son to celebrate with and be thankful for, I think I would be balled up in a corner somewhere moaning.  Thanks universe.

This morning Ellis and I put the finishing touches on our very first gingerbread house.

Or as Ellis calls it gingerbread man house. I did most of it last night after he went to sleep, but he helped me mix the icing. He loves to “mixed” things. His eyes lit up when he saw it first thing and he said “It’s all finished!” But we still had to put grass with snow around it so we got out his smock and some glue and got to work. As he was sitting there playing with the Elmer’s and fake grass he kept saying: E: Mommy open door. Me: It doesn’t open Ellis it’s pretend. E: Uh, Uh, Uh, mommy open DOOR! (uh, uh, uh is what he says when he’s trying really hard to get the words out quickly and is frustrated that it’s not coming easier.) Me: I’m sorry honey the door doesn’t open. E: Uh, uh, uh! There are kids in there! In other news, he had his first professional (well, super cuts) hair cut yesterday. He was very excited about going but about halfway through was really ready to be done with it. However, he was easily bribed with a strawberry lolly pop. The whole experience must have made an impression because he was big on detail when relaying the tail to his dad last night. (smock, fishys on it. I had lolly pop, strawberries. Sit still)

Hey whaddya know, this Wordpress thing has a password function.  So now instead of messing with another site entirely I’m just going to post those entries here with a password.  If your interested you can go there for the password or just email me.  A bit of a long way around I know.  Sorry, but it’s making things easier for me.

2 seconds after my alarm went off this morning telling me to get my ass up and take my mom to the airport shuttle, my little man started squeaking in his room.  You might think that this is one of the benefits of a two parent team, but then if you think that you’re probably not married yet.  Anyway, I digress.  So I’m bra-less and shoe-less and pants-less and trying to get Ellis to go back to sleep because the shuttle leaves at 6 and one needs a bra, shoes, and pants to leave the house.  Also, it’s 5:45 in the bloody morning and as soon as I get back I’m hoping to get back in bed again.  And we have this conversation.

E: I need to get up 

Me: No baby it’s not time to get up yet.  It’s the middle of the night, you need to put your head on your pillow OK.

(miraculously, he listens to me and lays back down)

E: I want an apple.

Me: No sweetie, try to go to sleep.  (At this point he’s holding my hands, something he does when he is going to sleep, but I’m in a hurry, so I push the issue and try to take them back)

E:  NO!  I WANT TO HOLD MOMMY’S HANDS A LIL BIT.

Me: I know honey but mommy has to go take YaYa to the place to get her shuttle.  (Now I’m expecting a mach 5 meltdown and trying to decide if it would be better just to take him with me, when he says this.)

E:  OK.  Bye bye momma in car.  (and he lets me leave the room without a fuss)

And THEN……THEN!  HE SLEPT UNTIL 10 AM.

I don’t think I can overemphasize this greatness.  I, of course, slept off and on while trying to convince myself that he was not, in fact, lying there without a pulse and that I should enjoy this lie in for the love of God woman.  But, hey, that’s just one of those lovely things that comes with being a mom.